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April 17, 2002 - 8:49 p.m.

i'm a bit drunk now so please do not fault me for poor logic. i met up with patsy and her new beau on the patio of the local watering hole. it was well needed. the beer and the company. life seems so strange right now. school will be over tommorrow and i will need to fill the gap with something else. i guess for now it will have to be a job search, but i am definitely feeling empty. my school world is about to vanish and this week i have also suffered knowing that someone i care about doesn't want to see me anymore. it feels so strange not to call the oliver platt boy. i know he needs time to sort things out, and i really want to give him time, but i also miss him. sigh.

more beer now.

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