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February 08, 2002 - 6:19 a.m.

i went to bed at one a.m. last night and woke up at four-thirty a.m. this morning. all is not well. i've been laying in bed with my eyes closed pretending like i should be able to sleep (it seems to come so easily to some people!) i'm over with that charade now. i've been at my computer since five this morning. i'm working. i'm finishing projects. i'm catching up. i'm becoming a better student. i'll be a better person. last night i worked for five hours on a director project. lingo coding can be kinda fun. i also played heavily with photoshop for my director project. when i did sleep last night, i had programming dreams and dreams of photoshop. those are bad dreams. i guess that is why i am awake now.

it is getting near to the end of term and i have so much to do. i still have more to shoot for my final video term project and lots more to edit. at least most of my footage is already captured on the computer. one good thing to come out of my no-sleep sleep was i think i may have a more fleshed out version of the script. peices are coming together. shots will fall into place. yesterday as i captured for hours at school, i realized that i had some really great looking shots. i also had many poorly lit ones too. things will balance out. i shouldn't be so worried. video should really be the least of my worries. i still haven't started my after effects project but i do have some ideas on how that one will go. i also still have to think about my web delivery exam. yikes! i knew there was a reason why i wasn't sleeping.

next term is the portfolio term. two months of putting everything together. i'll have to have a flash site, an html/javascript site, a print package, a cd-rom package, a dvd and a final portfolio project. ack. there will be many more sleepless nights from here on out. i will become regimented and prepared. i will kick ass. and i will have to find a job. that's the scariest part of all.

song for this dark, dark morning: seymour stein, belle and sebastian.

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